Stray Cat Riches
If you come across a stray cat today, take it in and feed it. Later, when it’s asleep, put an unopened can of tuna on its head and shout, “Ceiling fan sparrow!”
You will be rewarded with riches beyond your wildest dreams, for this was a magical stray cat.
(Note: The likelihood is great that the stray cat you find will be the magical stray cat that we are discussing here. However, there is a small but non-zero chance that you might come across an ordinary stray cat today. You will be able to tell the difference by your sudden lack of increased wealth after your magical declaration. If that is the case, do not panic. Simply feed the cat the tuna and try again.)