Danger: Booby-Trapped Web Page
This web page may be booby-trapped. Move carefully. Actually, right now it’s probably best to stay completely still and not step anywhere that you haven’t already stepped.
This is what I’d recommend: first, find a stone. Toss it into the middle of the web page to see if it triggers some kind of bear trap or trap door or something else with the word trap in it. Do that now. Get ready to leap in horror as the stone is crushed into a billion tiny little stone fragments by the jaws of steel in that vicious trap. Or not, there may not be a trap there at all.
Done? By now you should either have set off that trap, or found that there wasn’t one there. No matter what happened, I doubt that things are safe yet; there’s no way to know how many traps may be scattered around on this page. You should still be absolutely terrified about moving even a centimeter from where you’re standing right now! Are you terrified? If you don’t say yes, that might set off a trap too. You never know how trickily this page might be trapped.
The next thing to try is to stand up, and loudly and clearly read off the pass phrase: “Kangaroos need crayons to become great artists.” Make sure you get that right; many lives have been lost by improper pass phrase recital. Sit down very carefully, and wait quietly for something to happen. In this case it will be virtually impossible to tell if that accomplished anything. Either it had no effect, in which case you won’t notice anything, or it defused the Java bombs, in which case you won’t notice anything. Except that if you continue on, you’ll be safer and less caffeinated than if you hadn’t defused them. I’d recommend waiting for about fifteen minutes to make sure you’ve given the bombs time to defuse, if they were there after all.
Are you ready for step three? Get out your flashlight (I do hope you brought a flashlight) and shine it into the shadows of this web page. Take a good look around in there. Make sure you don’t see anything scurrying away from the light like an albino cockroach or a goth kid. If you do see anything moving in the shadows, you should probably call in a professional; this doesn’t sound like a web page for amateurs. Unless it’s a really little goth kid, you could probably take him without a problem.
If everything has gone well so far, it’s probably time to let your dog go ahead into this web page and see if he can sniff anything out. Hopefully you brought a danger-sniffing dog and not a drug-sniffing dog, because I didn’t bring any drugs for your dog. Let him go and root around in the underbrush and behind trees. Maybe he can dig up the HTML and make sure there aren’t any snakes or bears hiding underneath it. Have your rifle ready at all times in case he uncovers something scary and covered in tentacles.
If he doesn’t find anything, I think everything might be safe. I’m not saying that it’s definitely safe to continue, because I don’t want that kind of legal liability on my shoulders, but I would probably continue on into the web site at this point if it was me. What you do, of course, is entirely up to you.