Ideal Bus Line
I wish there were bus lines that ran right past my house. Actually, what I really want are bus lines that stop in front of my house. Well, actually, I don’t want them to do that all the time. Busses are pretty noisy, I wouldn’t want to have to listen to that all day and all night when I wasn’t taking advantage of it.
I guess what I’d really like were bus lines that only showed up when I wanted to go somewhere, and then went directly to the place I wanted to go without any spurious stops along the way.
But these also shouldn’t be uncomfortable, dirty busses. I would want these to be clean, relaxing, quiet, and comfortable. Maybe someone going up and down the aisle handing out food or pillows or bags full of money.
Yeah, that sounds just about right. If someone was to start a bus line like that, you can be sure that I would be a major fan and tell all my friends how great it was. Except it wouldn’t do them much good, seeing as how it just runs from my house to wherever I want to go, and only when I want to go there.
I guess the potential market is pretty limited. But I still think it’s a good investment.
Oh, and did I mention that this hypothetical ideal bus line would be extremely cheap, practically free? I’m sure it’ll still be profitable for whoever runs it, though I’m not sure about the details of how that would work out. Maybe I pay 25 cents a ride since it was my idea, and everyone else pays $1495 a ride to help subsidize its operating costs. That seems like one easy way to make this sustainable and profitable.
So go to it bus line operators and managers! Let’s see some action happening on this front in the next few weeks. I’ll be doing a lot of going from one place to another soon, and I’d hate to have to deal with actually driving myself all of those places. That’s just so uncool. I’m tired of being that uncool.
Please make me more cool. Please set up this bus line. You have no reason not to. All you have to lose is fear itself, and a little startup money in case you don’t follow my ideas and can’t figure out a way to keep it profitable on your own. But that’s obviously your fault. Everyone else would just be dealing with fear itself, why do you have to make the bus line lose money? That’s no way to run a business. I can’t believe you even call yourself a frisbee.
Oops, I didn’t mean to call you a frisbee just now. How rude of me. Please assume that any use of the F word is entirely accidental and not at all a slur against your flat, round, disc-like shape.
Ow, stop hitting me please.