For many years, golfers have been using modern technology to fill out their scorecards. While convenient and easy, technology does impose additional requirements on the golfer in terms of power needs, safety in rain, and weight of equipment being carried around. In this paper we will present a brand new framework and sample methodology for filling out a golf scorecard using only pencil and paper, which we call Gorf.

Introduction

Look at the golfer, standing at the tee, knees bent, golf club in hands. Legs planted firmly on the surface of the Earth. He does not stop to water the grass, even in the spots where it is getting a little bit brown. No, his attention is firmly fixed on the golf ball on the ground beside him.

Suddenly, without warning, he strikes the golf ball as if it were a chicken. The ball flies parabolically through the air, landing far from any sand or water traps. It is a fantastic drive, one that will be remembered for many hours to come.

Yes, this is the game of golf. It’s filled with the excitement of hitting balls and walking to where the balls wound up. The standard desktop computer helps all golfers with their scorekeeping for a modest fee per round.

Such an arrangement is now outdated with the introduction of Gorf, our automated golf scorekeeping methodology that uses TCP/IP over pencil and paper combined with a dynamic neural network for easy and computer-free golfing.

Implementation

Our graduate students spent years on this project, and have come up with a shiny new implementation of Gorf using six pencils, some strong sheets of cardboard, loose leaf paper, and eyeballs from one thousand pigeons. After playing 133 rounds of golf, we have concluded that the implementation works flawlessly.

Issues

Some golfers have expressed concern about the need to collect eyeballs from one thousand pigeons in order to keep track of their golf score. Further research is needed into the necessity of the pigeon eyeballs. At the moment our graduate students insist that they are necessary, but we will continue to have other graduate students researching this issue until they are able to come up with alternatives for the pigeon-averse golfer.

Conclusion

Gorf is the greatest innovation in the sport of golf since the amethyst putting iron.